Doormats Enchanted Keys Stress

SILENT WHEN OTHERS DEMEAN YOU

Silent when others demean you? Does this describe you?

The focus this week is on #6 of Ten Signs You Are A Doormat.

Allowing others to demean you by staying silent.

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Over at the Enchanted Blog there are Ten Enchanted Keys to help you banish stress and create life as the Enchanted Journey it is intended to be. It doesn’t matter where you started out on the path. What does matter is where you CHOOSE to go now.

REASONS YOU STAYED SILENT AS A CHILD

There are many reasons you chose to stay silent when others demeaned you.

-You were taught to remain silent.

-You may have received negative consequences for speaking up and challenging the authority person that demeaned you.

-You felt powerless.

-You felt worthless.

or…

YOU WERE VERY WISE

In using Enchanted Key #2 to Altered Perceptions, you can discover that you were very wise to remain silent. That may have saved your life. In the face of a Narcissist, an alcoholic or drug-addicted personality, an immature adult, or one who suffers from low self-esteem and feels out of control, a child is no match. Even as an adult, it’s challenging to deal with these individuals who don’t acknowledge a problem.

Sometimes silence is the safest and wisest choice.

WHAT TO DO TO HEAL NOW

As an adult, you can recognize the wounding that your inner child experienced. Rather than use your energy to blame the perpetrator, offer support and compassion to your tender inner self. You may have no role model from childhood, but there are plenty of us who can provide validation and recognition through our blogs and social media posters that let you know you’re understood and not alone. The Society For Recovering Doormats is one home, as is my Enchanted Blog @drterrysegal.com

Pat yourself on the heart and say, “It wasn’t your fault. You were wise to remain silent in the face of their demeaning criticism. They were talking to themselves through you. You just didn’t know that.” Now you know. That powerful information can break the spell.

Keep reminding yourself of that truth.

DISCLAIMER: Information on this site is provided for informational purposes only and is not meant to substitute for the advice provided by your own physician or other medical professional.

Comments (2)

  • Yesterday at art group, I sit at a table by myself as the men don’t like it if I sit with them. When my friend Jo (female) came in, one spoke up and said “come and sit with us real artists”. And she did. I was so upset, but I did not let it show. I carried on as usual for another 39 minutes or so and left. As I live in a retirement village, it was a short walk home, but those words, and similar words I had heard all my 64 years of life “your not good enough and you never will be” all kept rolling around in my head.

    Reply
    • It’s just Dragon Chatter, Heather! Don’t listen to it. These situations present themselves all of the time, giving us opportunities to finally say to ourselves, “I AM good enough. I always have been and will always be!” Try saying it aloud. It’s truth and your soul will recognize it as such. I applaud you for even stepping out to attend. Tomorrow’s blog post is about stepping out of your comfort zone. Here you are, already having done that. Yay, YOU!!! Hugs.

      Reply

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